Recently, my family celebrated the wedding of my nephew. My mind played back a host of memories from his childhood, and I found myself recalling the times I spent with him as a young man. 1 Corinthians 13 was read as a part of the ceremony, and as I listened, one verse captivated me. “So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:13, ESV). My thoughts journeyed toward the word hope. Hope is fragile and a needed virtue during troubling times.
This young couple will undoubtedly need faith and love, but hope will certainly be required for the coming days. Many people I have talked to are clinging to hope. They have a yearning for the hope needed in the present moment, hope for their children, hope for a better life, and a preferred future. Hope, though, can be fragile at best, and often we find ourselves devoid of this mighty virtue. Solomon addresses the fragility of hope in Proverbs 13:12, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” One of the many reasons we lose hope is unmet expectations.
Our Hearts Lose Hope When Our Expectations Are Not Met
All of us are prone to have expectations. Some can voice and articulate our expectations, while some hide our expectations from others and even from ourselves. We may not even be aware of those hidden expectations or desires in our hearts. However, these expectations, if unmet, are in danger of becoming demands. Demands often become rights, and rights, whether God-given or not, tend to dominate our lives if not tempered by a balanced view toward our fellow man and the God who created us. When we believe we have a right to something and it is not delivered, then we feel cheated, slighted, and honestly, used. Now, we are in danger of our hearts beginning to lose hope. Our heart is the control seat of our emotional nature. In our hearts, we process the life events which shape our attitude, disposition, and overall way we view the world. Once an expectation is not met, we begin to lose hope. Hope in others, hope in God’s plan, and hope in the future. Indeed, we will not get everything we expect in this life, so from a biblical worldview, it’s vital we protect our heart from the calamity of an unfulfilled expectation. The importance of protecting our hearts is found in Proverbs 4:23, “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.”
The Peace of God for a Restless Sick Heart
An unguarded, unprotected heart will lead to a loss of hope and unfruitful life. How do we guard our hearts? I have found from experience that I am not the best protector of my heart. I allow my heart to chase after unchecked wants and desires. I let my heart be captured by the spirit of the age or my current crisis. My heart can become bitter and irritated when I am not disciplined to guard it at all times. Yet, for believers, those who hold fast to the faith in Christ, we have a guard for our hearts. Paul writes in Philippians 4:7, “And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Paul provided two vital truths when it comes to guarding our hearts. First, we seek the peace of God. Many desire peace in their lives, yet few find it. God offers peace that goes beyond comprehension, a peace that is often not fully explainable but still fully applied to the life of the believer. The second truth is found in this question: where do we find this peace? Paul explains that true peace comes from the truth found in our life in Christ. Once we truly abide in Christ, the peace of God erupts in our life. The word abide describes how we interact with Christ daily. When we abide in Christ, we actively chose to give Him priority over our lives and say, “Your will, not mine.” For me, it involves actively pursuing Christ just like any other relationship. I invest my time, my words, my thoughts, and my efforts into my relationship with Him. Abiding can look different for each of us, but it is essential to the life of a faithful Christian and to experience peace. The life we live as Christians, we live in and through Christ and in His redemptive work on the cross. His peace will guard our hearts and our minds from unmet expectations and disappointments.
We Can Hold on to Hope When Our Desires Change
Author, Pastor, and Theologian John Piper writes the following in his classic work, Desiring God: “God is most glorified when you are most satisfied in him.” This statement is profound and offers hope to those wrestling with unmet desires and expectations. Before our appetites change, the object of our desire must change. The problem I have with a troubled and sick heart, devoid of hope, is simple. I love something or someone more than I love God. At the root of the problem is idol-worship. I am not talking about the idols addressed in the Old Testament, where the prophet Isaiah says, “All who fashion idols are nothing, and the things they delight in do not profit” (Isaiah 44:9). I am talking about the idol which I fashion with each decision, attitude, and emotion which proceeds out of my heart. Every day, I craft idols of expectations, desires, and wants, then I bow down to them, hoping against hope that they may hear me and give me what I desire. These idols have no redemptive power and will never satisfy my soul. They only bring disappointment, hurt, isolation, and a sick heart. In essence, the idols I craft promise more than they can ever deliver. So, what do we do? We cast down every idol manufactured in our heart, along with every heart-sick desire at the feet of Jesus. There, and only there, will we find the peace and rest our heart desires. At the cross, hope is resurrected when we lay our desires down, and we find that in Jesus, all our heart’s desires are met indeed.